Fancy Parties!

I'm about to go hop on an airplane to go to a fancy corporate christmas party. Goodie! I haven't been to one of these in years.

And what am I most thrilled about? The fact that I get to wear my new suit!

We need to make a Vegas trip happen in the near future too so I can wear it again. Vegas calls for a black shirt with a black suit though. Christmas party... maybe white or pink.

  

People watching on the train

There's a guy next to me on light rail who's filing his nails. It's a little odd, when was the last time you saw someone filing their nails? Much less on public transportation?

And how long does it take to file your nails before you're down to stubs of fingers?

I almost feel like asking, but looking over, he has the build of a boxer. Squat. Powerful. And the strap on his bag isn't actually a strap. It's inch and a half chain. You don't mess with a guy using 15 pounds of chain to hold a shoulder bag.

And yet he's also wearing a tie. You have to imagine a story there.

  

Cape Cod Pants

While at Chris and Lindsay's wedding, I decided that the one thing my wardrobe "needs" is a pair of Cape-Cod-red pants.

Now, however, I realize that I need a little bit more. The person who taught me this? Ralph Lauren.

Go to the web page for Lauren's "Big Pony Frangrances" and watch the One Republic soundtracked advertisement. About 30 seconds in there are two dudes who look like they should be Kennedys. Striped oxford shirts, tweed blazers, colorful striped ties. I almost have the haircut of the guy on the left too, I think I could pull it off.

Well, until you get to the end of the ad and see that they're wearing their red and yellow pants at the same time. I'm not sure I have the balls to do that.

  

Unfortunate fashion of the week

This week's edition is nearly as bad a violation as last week, but it's the name + look combo that makes you shake your head. I give you "Harem Pants":

To be fair, I'm sure it's possible for these to be worn properly, if you can avoid the wet/saggy diaper look... but what's wrong with normal yoga pants? Anyway I can't wait until the MC Hammer fashion redux continues, and I can bust out a men's version of harem pant jumpsuits. Yikes.

  

Ugliest clothing ever

The other day K was flipping through one of the "spring" Victoria's Secret catalogues when she actually snorted and laughed out loud. I'm guessing that's not really what a hot-knickers-and-bras-and-swimsuits company is going for, but judge for yourself:

This color disaster option seems to be no longer available on the VS website, but fortunately the above picture from the catalogue was archived by TheFashionPolice.net, along with choice analysis:

Here’s a simple test you might want to use if you’re trying to decide whether an item of clothing will be flattering to wear or not. We use it sometimes when we’re interrogating possible fashion criminals, and we call it the Victoria’s Secret Model test. It works like this:

1. Take one Victoria’s Secret model. Any one will do.

2. Force her to try on the item you suspect may be a closet criminal. (No pun intended.)

3. Observe. Is the item flattering on the model? No? Then it sure as hell isn’t likely to be flattering on too many of the rest of us either: test failed!

Clearly it's a coincidence that the item has been marked down, and can now be had for a mere $89 (from $108). You will, however, have to pay full price for the "Silk Cargo Jumpsuit" atrocity (which by the way would be an awesome album name, if albums actually still existed.

  

Hooray sarcasm!

For an uplifting follow-up to my previous post, I encourage the bleeps (blog peeps?) to check out TeachTheControversy.com, a site intended to point out the false equity of science and all the nutcase conspiracy/theories out there.

Let sarcasm be your weapon in the great evolution vs. creationism debate! You don't have to be an atheist to want to keep science in science class, and sporting one of these graphic tees sarcastically urging schools to teach other pseudosciences, myths and discredited theories is a fine way to show your pro-science stance. Darwin would be proud!

It's a good thing that the designed are labeled (on mouse-over) b/c I wasn't sure of several of them. Cleverly done at least, even if it's probably a case of preaching to the choir.