Ugliest clothing ever

The other day K was flipping through one of the "spring" Victoria's Secret catalogues when she actually snorted and laughed out loud. I'm guessing that's not really what a hot-knickers-and-bras-and-swimsuits company is going for, but judge for yourself:

This color disaster option seems to be no longer available on the VS website, but fortunately the above picture from the catalogue was archived by, along with choice analysis:

Here’s a simple test you might want to use if you’re trying to decide whether an item of clothing will be flattering to wear or not. We use it sometimes when we’re interrogating possible fashion criminals, and we call it the Victoria’s Secret Model test. It works like this:

1. Take one Victoria’s Secret model. Any one will do.

2. Force her to try on the item you suspect may be a closet criminal. (No pun intended.)

3. Observe. Is the item flattering on the model? No? Then it sure as hell isn’t likely to be flattering on too many of the rest of us either: test failed!

Clearly it's a coincidence that the item has been marked down, and can now be had for a mere $89 (from $108). You will, however, have to pay full price for the "Silk Cargo Jumpsuit" atrocity (which by the way would be an awesome album name, if albums actually still existed.


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"O Whisky! soul o' plays and pranks! Accept a bardie's gratfu' thanks! When wanting thee, what tuneless cranks Are my poor verses! Thou comes-they rattle in their ranks, At ither's a-s!" Robert Burns - "Scotch Drink" 1785

One thought on “Ugliest clothing ever”

  1. I don't know, the cargo jumpsuit doesn't look that bad to me. It obviously has to be on the right person and needs to be unbuttoned quite a ways... The other thing though is "I'm wearing a diaper under this and haven't changed it in the last two weeks." That's just bad bad bad.

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